TODAY IS THE DAY
Often times I don't feel like I have much to offer here on this blog. I find myself believing that life is crazy for everyone, positivity seems fleeting at times, and exhaustion hits us all, so where's the point in trying to fight it? But I also fight hard to remember that the sharing of experiences and stories is a powerful tool that God has given us.
As a senior in college, life is full. Like, too full.
I find myself skipping class just to catch up on studying, sleeping less in order to catch up with friends, missing one important thing for another, beginning the early stages of wedding planning (ahh!), registering for graduation and working out the ends of this whole college experience (double ahhh!), and doing my best to soak it all in while battling the numbness and frustration that comes with depression and anxious filled days.
I'm happy. Sometimes. And what I mean by that is that I FIGHT for my happiness and for my joy. Gosh darn it, I fight harder for it than anything else.
So on the days when I remember to fight, and on the days when I have the energy to fight, I'm happy.
And through this journey, I'm learning the importance of today.
Today, I only have one class (that I may or may not go to).
Today, I don't have any midterms (praises).
Today, I get to hang with my church community.
Today, is somewhat sunny and only slightly freezing.
Today, I had time to read my favorite book in the morning!
Today, my roommate brought me Starbucks (the best!!!).
Today, I have the time in my schedule to breathe a little and catch up.
Today is a new day with time to figure things out.
Today is a new day where I get to choose joy.
Today is a new day to learn that God will fight for me, I need only to be still.
Yesterday was awful. And tomorrow may very well be awful. But I don't need to live yesterday again, and I don't want to live tomorrow yet. So I'm going to hide in today and pretend that its the only day I have to deal with, because honestly...that seems nice.
AND IN REALITY, IT IS THE ONLY DAY I HAVE TO (GET TO?) DEAL WITH!
BIG NEWS: Its also the only day you and I can live right now. So lets live right now.
I know I can't be the only one who struggles with wanting to go back, or wanting to move forward. So lets try to live in today together?
What are you doing TODAY? Whatever it is, have fun with it, make the most if it, be fully present. Worry about the rest of time, some other time.